De-stressing your Wedding Planning
Today I want to talk about wedding planning and the importance of de-stressing the whole process.
When we start wedding planning, it's not like we are going to train to run a sprint but it's more like training for a marathon. You need to be physically, emotionally and mentally ready for the one special day in your life that you have been dreaming about.
I have even had one bride refer to the day as the 'Evil Thing' and she wished the whole day was over because she didn't want to be on this merry-go-round anymore. This is definitely not going to put you in the right mindset to plan your wedding day if you think of it this way.
The one thing couples forget when planning their wedding is to have fun. Your wedding is about the celebration, the laughter and the people you love enjoying your day with you. I love weddings and I want you to love yours as well.
Are you a list person?
If you are a list person, planning a wedding will be a breeze for you.
But if you don't, the one thing that weddings have are never ending lists. This is where you need to give yourself permission to take regular breaks in your wedding planning. These breaks should be as high up on the list as choosing a date, a venue or even hiring the wedding planner you are going to use.
And they need to be regularly pencilled in.
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As a wedding planner, I see lots of my couples feeling tired, drained and exhausted, long before their wedding day arrives because they are not taking the breaks from the wedding planning that their bodies need and want.
Some other clear signs that you are not taking care of yourself is:
- Feeling worried, overwhelmed and anxious about everything, not just wedding planning.
- Procrastinating and not committing to anything on your list. You are having a huge feeling of pressure on your shoulders and think your brain is going to explode.
It is ok to feel a little nervous about the big day, but if you are more negative that positive about things, then you won't have fun planning your wedding. There won't be giggling and laughter and I want you to be excited and enjoy the wedding process.
I have created a list of 5 ways you can reduce you Wedding Planning Stress.
1. Stay Connected
With the pressure of wedding planning, sometime couples forget that they are going to be married and it's not just about one day.
Schedule nights out. I think they call them 'Date Nights'. Quality time for you and your fiancé.
This is the time you can talk honestly about the things that are worrying you and the things that you are excited about when you think about your wedding day.
2. Write a List and Get Organised
With the different vendors that you have for your wedding, you can quickly become overwhelmed if you don't create some sort of organisation for yourself. There is nothing worse than coming home from work and seeing a pile of paper. This mess will stress out your mind and this will stress you out and make your body feel heavy and lethargic.
No-one wants to become the wicked witch from hell because your kitchen table looks like a war zone.
Creating yourself a folder to keep everything in will help de-clutter and de-stress your brain. Keep everything in vendor order and then you will be able to find things quickly if needed.
3. Take Care of Yourself
For those that don't know, I'm an exercise nut. When I have heaps of weddings on and lots of things to do, I exercise regularly. For me my choice of exercise is running, walking and Taekwondo.
Exercise has positive emotional and psychological effects on the brain. You don't have to do something as extreme as me. Take a walk, go for a run or simply dance around the house, while singing at the top of your voice. Any physical movement will create the right endorphins to reduce your stress levels.
4. Create Boundaries for Family & Friends
From the moment you stay you are engaged, the people around you will want to share their opinions and what they think you should do for your wedding. What dress you wear, the place you should get married or the venue you just need to book today.
Family and friends think that they have all the answers but only you and your fiancé know what is in your mind. Your thoughts and feelings about things are exactly that, your thoughts and feelings.
With out yelling and screaming, a simple statement you could use is 'Thanks so much, we're got it covered' or 'Thanks for your thoughts, that's something to think about!'. And the most important thing is to change the subject and talk about something else.
5. Allow Yourself to be Nervous
Being nervous is normal. Being a Bridezilla is not.
Fear often accompanies pre-wedding excitement. It's normal, healthy and it's part of the wedding process. Being concerned doesn't mean you don't want to get married, it is your brain questioning what you are doing to make sure you are doing the right thing for you.
About your brain
Our brain is a funny thing. It is trying to keep us safe and familiar from the scary things we might be doing.
Think about the last time you did something new. Like climbing across some rocks or walking up a big hill and you thought you couldn't do it. This is the same fear to your brain.
If your nerves are getting the better of you, call a friend, someone you can confide in or you could call your wedding coordinator and just talk to them and express your concerns and worries. Talking things out will help you.
Remember you 'Why'.
Finally, the best tip I can give you is to 'Remember your why' you are getting married.
You are planning a life together with the person you love and a celebration with family and friends to celebrate your union together.
Whenever these feelings of stress and anxiety start to raise their heads, stop and breathe. Give yourself permission to take a break and step back from all the planning. Remember what is important and forget about the things that are not important.