Should a bridesmaid choose her own dress

Pros & cons on letting the Bridesmaid choose

There are many Pros & Cons on letting the bridesmaid choose her dress. The latest bridal party trend is to have bridesmaids wear coordinated, but not matching, gowns on the Big Day.

We could make this article very negative by only giving you the Cons and what could go wrong of a Bridesmaid choosing her own dress but there are many Pros.

One is that the bridesmaid doesn't feel like they are an after thought and feels honoured to be a special part of your wedding.

Flexiblity

But while this certainly allows your 'maids more flexibility -- and ensures no one gets stuck wearing a dress that doesn't flatter her figure -- having attendants wear different dresses might still require some degree of coordination on your part.

You ask yourself what could possibly go wrong with the bridesmaids choosing? Also to you, you can see the vision and of course they are going to see the DREAM you have for your wedding.

Well here are some things to think about to bring clarity to your decision and take not it is YOUR DECISION!!!

Pros
should I say No

- Bridal party symmetry and unity.
This is perhaps the number one reason that brides choose matching outfits for their girls.
You have this image & dream for your wedding and you want the pictures to look perfect. One overall colour helps you achieve this.
An overall simplified look. For the bride that prefers a minimalistic look – or those who like solid tones/colours it creates an uncomplicated and cohesive look for each girl.
Varying gowns can draw eyes every which way, but simple, matching ensembles focus attention on faces rather than outfits.-
Upheld tradition for a classic affair. Tradition can sometimes be the biggest thing on your big day: perhaps you have even imagined what their girls’ dresses would look like from an early age.
Some may be unwilling to let go of a dream they’ve had since childhood – they uphold the notion that matching dresses accent an elegant, classic wedding perfectly.

Cons
should I say yes

Mixed preferences. Everyone has a different body type will undoubtedly come into play while searching for bridesmaid dresses. You can't make that one dress fit everyone because your bridesmaids aren’t all one person, one body, or one mind.
They’ll likely have preferences one way or the other, and those preferences might not always match up. You may be setting yourself up for some disagreements amongst your bridal party.-
Matching dresses could look like uniforms. Matching dresses can create unity, but they can also look like uniforms.
If you know that your girls have different tastes, and you still insist they wear the same gown, you’re simply using your closest friends as extras for your photo album.
If your close friend is miserable for the evening it may not be a happy event.
One price, different budgets. One bridesmaid can afford one thing that might be that $1000 dress but with different jobs and backgrounds: what one woman may be able to afford easily, another may not.
If you’re not paying for the dresses yourself, this could spark some hurt and uncomfortable feelings.
If you take each bridesmaid aside and ask nicely about their budget, you might suddenly realise their limitation. They also may opt out just because of the budget.

Conclusion:

1. Remember, a bride is the ultimate decision-maker.

You are not only the guest of honour, but also the executive producer of the event in terms of getting to ultimately make decisions.

Therefore, you should be involved in every important discussion on all topics -- bridesmaids' wardrobe included. (After all, one of your most cherished photos from your wedding day will be of you and your attendants.)

My philosophy is: this is your wedding -- when it's time for your bridesmaids to get married, then they will choose what you wear.

2. Scope out dresses first on your own.

Before bringing your attendants with you to a bridal salon, go solo to try on styles, get familiar with fabrics and understand what cuts might compliment each of your bridesmaids' figures.

Doing this on your own will allow you to get a sense of what you want and what will fit your vision without your girls giving opinions every step of the way.

3. Make sure everyone is comfortable with their dresses.

While you have the final say, it's important to take two things into account when you're outfitting your 'maids: weight (including pregnancy) and religion.

For example, if a bridesmaid is just not okay wearing a strapless dress (either because she is religious or because she is heavier and fuller-busted and needs support from a bra with straps) the bride ought to be reasonable.

After all, this is a time for love and celebration and bringing the family and friends together, not to find reasons to argue.

As the saying goes: don't sweat the small stuff

4. Always set at least a few guidelines.

Some brides prefer to have their bridesmaids choose their own dresses to really ensure everyone feels comfortable in what they wear.

However, this can get tricky when every woman just chooses a dress without any direction. If you decide to give your 'maids reign over the dress decision process, set some parameters to ensure everyone looks coordinated on your Big Day.

I suggest giving everyone guidelines for the following: designer, fabric, colour or colour family and length of dress (full-length, tea-length, and so on.)

5. Share your vision with your bridesmaids.

No matter if you chose one dress for everyone, select a few dresses for bridesmaids to choose from, or allow each attendant to pick her own dress on her own, be sure to show your bridal party what you envision they will look like at your wedding.

Offering your inspirational images will make sure everyone is on the same page-and give your bridesmaids some much-appreciated direction of what you're going for.

With these images in mind, they will not only be excited to help you fulfil your wedding "look," they will feel even more special that they get to help carry it out!

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